Hello you lot, how are you doing? I thought I’d just jump on for a quick chat seeing as I have so many nice photos from Adele that I still want to share, I’m sure you’re getting bored of seeing them on Instagram by now…
So what’s new? What have I missed?
I’m not quite ready for it to be Easter yet (where is this year going?) but saying that, I’m super ready for the sun. I’ve been parenting without Calum for almost three weeks now and my tank is running low, literally – the hum of this breast pump has been going so long I swear my boobs resemble wet tea bags. Anyway, I digress, where were we? Ah yes, the sun always makes such a difference to my mood and it means we can get outside and expel some of that toddler energy that is literally bubbling over by 9am.
I hadn’t intended to get deep tonight, but I guess I need to get this out. Being a Mum is my favourite job in the world, but they weren’t kidding when they said it would be a challenge. Between the issues we’ve been having with Ivers sleep and Wren being at that super inquisitive age (the word ‘Why’ is now on my list of ‘most hated words in the world-ever‘) I am d o n e.
Do not get me wrong, she is fierce, and she is confident. She asks questions and she wants to learn, but you know when you can just tell they’re asking for the millionth time to see what you’ll do? It’s like they can literally see the cracks between your eye twitch and your greys and want to see what will happen. I can feel the cracks myself, I’ve become very aware that I am turning into the ‘shouty mum’ and I need my extra pair of hands home to take some of the heat.
I think it’s super important to recognise when you need help, when you need a break and to admit it. I’m here, admitting that I have been a sucky mum and a shouty mum and a bit of an ass hole to my kids this last week. I am tired, I am so tired and they are baring the brunt of it, poor sods. I know that if Iver could just give me one solid nights sleep I could be so much better, but until that day I need to manage in other ways. I’ve been trying to look after myself, drinking lots of water, doing lots of lovely skincare, making sure my tired ass is taking what little time for myself I can get. But let me tell you- I am super excited to hand my kids over to my husband and run for the hills, bath, nearest pub…anywhere will do just so long as there’s wine!
If you’re feeling the pressure lately too, I am with you. Know you are not alone, you’re doing your best and you’re only human, you can only do so much, and I’m always here should you need to chat! I cancelled our plans today as I recognised that we needed to just put the breaks on and recalibrate in our own four walls. I’m super lucky to have such supportive friends and family, most of whom are in similar situations or have been, so they totally get it! I’ll be forever grateful for these people!
Anyway, what a super pointless ramble to get to show you some photos eh? If anyone is still here, congrats! You get a gold star! Oh, and if anyone is after some Ecru jeans, I’d highly recommend these Weekday ones! They’re very tight, so maybe size up, but the shape is lovely and I really can’t wait to wear them with slides during the warmer weather! Over and out. Sx